EATING TIME

When it comes to trying new things foodwise I am right there. I am Johnny on the spot.And more often than not it turns out for the better. Though a time or two here in PRC and in Saigon, I almost lived to regret my enthusiasum for trying new dishes, many of which were unidentifible.
Of course many times it is the indentifible ones that will turn you inside out. The unidentifible ones are always good for a game of "guess the mystery meat", or "what is on that stick?" Unfortunately China doesn't have too many unidentifible meats on a stick. No, it is quite easy to tell what is going down the gullet. And it ain't often pretty.
Why right next to my school's gate they got the Bar-B-Que set up. And they are selling little birds on a stick; whole birds, mind you. Now if you ask they'll tell you they are sparrows-I'll let in on a little secret here. in this part of China, hell maybe all over it, many believe sparrows have Viagra like powers, but chances are they are baby chicks. Now I don't believe I have ever seen a dead, gutted, shoved on a stick, ready for 'Queing sparrow before. But I have it on good authority that a sparrow done up in such a manner, as previously described, looks awfully similiar to a a chick ready for the 'Que; of which I have seen many and tried to get a taste for, once.
The way I look at it BBQ is BBQ. Though now I have a list of exceptions to this rule and well Chinese BBQ'ed baby chicks or 'sparrow' are on it. At this time they are the only such exception. However, they might come off the list if I get the bottle of 'Queing sauce I've been a hankering for, or some ranch sauce. Either one of these things will make dam near anything taste good enough to keep down. And this is a vital element when eating mystery meat, on a stick, or otherwise.
This brings me back to the point want to get to which is in China there are very few mystery meats. No sir, there is little opportunity to pretend you are eating something you are not. It is quite impossible to imagine you are eating a plump, juicy, juices running down your arm, South Side Chicago brat, with all the love that a wonderful Italian hard-roll can hold, when you are face-to-face with a chicken's foot, or claw. Especially if said foot still has the toe nail on it-side note: I am willing to show any and all the proper way to de-claw a 'Qued, pickled, fried, presevered, or Wal-Mart vaccumed packed chicken's foot, with one's mouth of course. No, it is not easy at all.
And so as I sit here turkey-less I thought I might list all the non-traditional holiday foods I have crossed paths with over the last year or so: fish brains, cow stomach, cow intestines, fish eye soup, chicken claws, boilded pig brains, pig's feet, nose, ear and nuckle, fish head, grubs, grasshopper, scorpion, camel on a stick, dog, stew cat-pan fried,
alligator,sea horse, and star fish. I can say that unfortunatily most did not taste like chicken, though the gator did. And so I wish you all happy Holidays.