Basket-Brawl?

The girl's basketball teams here in Sanming City, deep along the south east coast of China, play an interesting brand of b-ball. It is rough and tumble, full of mindless violence, like a brawl or riot, without the over turned cars or torn out store fronts. The teams move as packs around the ball, swirling around it like the dirt and horrid smell twirls around Charlie Brown's friend, Pig Pen.



I often see the girls from my ESL Classes practicing. Their coaches, usually some boys from the P.E. Department, try to get the girls to execute basic skill drills. And for the most part the girls do OK with the drills. Well, they do well as long as they are simple lay-ups or fast break drills. Otherwise, it is pandemonium, and the practice becomes an 8* person stampede to capture the ball.



At game time, it breaks down into anarchy, with nary a foul called. Of course, it fouls were called with any consistency, the game would never be played. Well it would never be played in a fun, meaningful, way. Rather the game would consist of the opening tip-off, a foul, free throws, and either a mad scramble for a rebound or an inbound pass, either of which would result in a foul. Repeat these steps-without tip-off-until time runs out or all the players foul out.



Seldom is a girl far from the pack. If a girl is alone, standing away from the violent horde, it is because one team is about to score and she is setting up to either start the fast break, or try to stop it. Just as likely she is taking a respite, gathering a moment of peace, away from the flying elbows, dagger like hand strikes, or the bone crunching slaps; all of which are intended to secure the ball, force the other team to relinquish control, or just as likely to add to the violence of the scrum. She will stand there breathing heavy, eying the riot. Perhaps she is regarding her chance of success if she reenters the swirling madness. Perhaps she waiting for the optimum opportunity to pay back whom ever launched themselves into the pack last. Or maybe she seeks to avenge her inglorious spill on to the concert
floor of the semi-covered outdoor court. And if in the process, she knocks the ball loose or wrestles it away, then all the better.


Often times before the lone girl decides to crash into nucleus of sweating, writhing bodies, a teammate spots her and attempts to launch the pill through flailing limbs and the twisting mass of hands, faces, hair and bodies. The ball is pushed up and over the throbbing mass. Sometimes the rock makes it to the intended destination. Just as likely it is to fall short and be re-consumed by the mob.



If the lone girl does get the ball she makes a mad dash towards the basket while trying to remember to bounce it. Sometimes she is able to enact the lay-up she has spent weeks practicing. Yet, more often than not the mob catches her and the ball before she makes it half way to the basket. It envelops the girl, moving like a swarm of some supernatural menace in a bad horror flick. This madness continues until the game is over.



Through out the game, I am yelling at the refs to call fouls in my bad Chinglish. And after awhile I give up wanting them to call fouls for my team, I find myself begging for any foul to be called. For the love of humanity, for the sake of the girls' health, for all that is good and Holy, call a foul. Yet they seldom do. The girls end up with black eyes, bruised limbs, scraped knees and lips. And I end up horse and thankful I don't have to play against my students. And the students don't mind when I get horse, that means they get to watch movies in class. I don't mind that myself.

Driving in China

Drivers in China need skills beyond the basic driving one: Buddha-like patience, eyes in the side of the head, and reflexes like a cat, a super hero cat-just to name a few.
The traffic comes from everywhere and all at once. There are so many starts and stops, it seems impossible to reach one's destination. Traffic is passing on all sides, and some fool-driver is passing a vehicle which is already passing another vehicle. People are stepping into cross walks, and jumping out of alley ways. Old women, with bamboo carriers holding dangling baskets of chickens, veggies, sand, eggs or some such things, barrel into cross walks with nary a traffic checking glance.
If the driver is a cabbie, mini bus or moto driver, he or she needs to keep alert for potential fare pick-ups. These drivers will whip a u-turn with no concern for laws, traffic, animals, or limb. And that is after they pick up a fare. Or they will stop in front of the bus stop and harrass folks-honking, heckling, and staring at people until someone gives in or the driver gives up. Why even a shake of the head no is enough to earn an extra 5 or 10 seconds of bedeviling. I found the safest spot to be, when a cabbie spots a fare, is indoors. And whenever I found myself in a cab, or other vehicle driving through Chinese towns or countryside the safest option was to close my eyes.
Of course I could have grown eyes in the side of my head, honed my super hero, cat-like reflexes and taken up driving. But I would either still be waiting to make a left handed turn, or waiting for the tow-truck and probably the ambulance.

How would you like to cross this street?

The traffic in Sanming City, Fujian Province isn't as bad as the picture above, but it is no less challenging to cross.

Sanming City is a small, river city of about 500,000 people, give or take. The main streets are nice and wide and are flanked by good sized office buildings and apartments. Most street corners have a white iron fence projecting out about two feet from the curb. The fence is about 3 ½ or 4 feet high and it has an opening for people to step out into the cross walk, and it makes a sort of bike path so that bike riders don't use the sidewalk. Of course they use the sidewalks with great regularity. Car and small delivery truck drivers also use the sidewalk to pull up in front of stores and for parking. Motos, or as we know them mopeds, run up and down it as well, in the belief that the sidewalks are safer-true, for the drivers at least. And they think they will get to their destination quicker-debatable. Along with dodging these motorized terrors on the sidewalk , there are bikes, people and animals to contend with. The situation is compounded when it is time to cross the street.  

In America I look to the left before stepping into the street. In Thailand and other strangely British influenced places I look to the right; but here in Sanming I look everywhere. I check my left. I check my right. I check straight ahead, and right behind. No matter where I look it seems as if every contraption and person in a three block radius is moving in my direction.  

There are tri-wheeled bikes pushed along by tiny, silver-haired matrons. Their bikes' baskets haul fruits and veggies, or the delicious candy like snack made by the Urgur people, of Western China. It is like Snickers with out the chocolate. Moto cabbies sit off to sides of the street crossings, smoking cigarettes, ready to speed a body, or a package deep into the bowels of this river town. When they see me they shout out the three or so English words and phrases they know: “Hello”, “Hey You”, and “Very Good.” Invariability the men's “Very Good” becomes garbled as they excitingly shout, trying to get my attention. Soon it sounds as if they are shouting “Betty Goose” Before too long, they all seem to be shouting, “Hey You. Betty Goose. Betty Goose.” All the while they are waving at me, or motioning me over. Meanwhile old women walk along the streets; their faces shielded by weathered, conical hats, their backs bent under the harden bamboo carrier, brown hand woven baskets dangle from both ends; they are overflowing with chickens and ducks, or fresh eggs and swamp spinach. Beggars, kowtow on the flithy corners, pleading for money in the local dialect. They switch to sub-standard Mandarin when I pass by. The beggars' pleas are lost as hawkers conjole passers-by to buy fresh pineapple on a stick, or some cheap toy, or paper thin polyester socks.  

I do my best to acknowledge every person, but at the same time politely avoid them, as I make ready to cross the street. For I have learned that I must check all directions, as often as possible. The situation, events, my standing in the crosswalk changes micro-second to micro-second.  

Just when the way appears secure a pedi-cab comes ripping by and almost takes out a businessman stepping out into the cross walk next to me. He is trying to get home for lunch. A quick check to see if more pedi-cabs are coming finds a moto coming the wrong way down the bike path. Turning to the left there is a green taxi cab doing a rolling stop at the corner trying to catch a break in the on-coming traffic. The on-coming traffic is passing a young woman pedaling a tri-wheel basket bike. It is piled high with yellow apples, red grapes, and the brownish bitter fruit that is so beloved here. First to pass the lady is one of the city's big orange public buses, overflowing with school kids, going home for the noon hour rest. Then a black Volkswagen-very popular in this part of China-is passing the bus and finally a lone moto driver is attempting to out flank both the car and the bus. All three vehicles have gone into the other lane of traffic and completely filled it up. All the while every horn in every vehicle is being blasted. Some are blasting a warning, while others signify some body, or some vehicle needs to move to the side. A few of the horn blasts are coming from cabbies trying to get the attention of pedestrians laden with packages, or that of walkers who seem to have the air of impatience.
 
I have discovered a trick to safily navigate the dangers of street cross; it is to walk with an escort. Not that kind. Rather I find someone going my way and walk next to them. If it is a small child or lady I try to walk so I am shielding them from the insanity which rules the roads here. I find it is most helpful to walk with a group, or along side one of the many three wheeled bicycles transversing the city streets.  

Behind the businessman is an old man, skinny and hunched over; he is pushing one of these contraptions, empty. So I fall in next to him and his bike. I study him as I scan the traffic. He looks like he is swimming in the blue Mao jacket. His face is creased and and a deep brown. His matching blue pants are rolled up to the ankles and sway like a dress in the small breeze. I am almost caught out, looking the opposite way checking traffic when he boldly pushes the bike into traffic. Doing this causes the on coming vehicles to slow down, swerve, or speed up to avoid him. We make it ½ way across plowing through on coming pedistrians, and swerving motos, while blithifully ignoring any vehicle with four or more wheels. The situation looks aces.

I begin to move hoping to cover the next half of the journey quickly but safely. However, I notice the old man hasn't moved. I quickly check to make sure a speeding vehicle of any sort is not barring down on me, or rather us. Then I see a bus begin to pull away from the curb, ½ a block up; he is waiting for it to pass. As the big orange monster rolls by, the man lunges forward and the bike's three wheels groan in unison. As the bike slowly moves into the lane of traffic, he pushes hard into the handle bars, trying to make it move faster. He looks sort of like a linebacker digging in and shouldering on against a tackle dummy. 

We are almost across and the bike is about to hit the access ramp unto the sidewalk, when two pedi-cabs on the sidewalk make ready to hit the ramp and spill out into the street. Additionally there are three moto cabbies, two are staring at me and the old man and one is finishing picking up a fare and making ready to blast down the ramp, heading Lord only know where. The moto driver guns it and almost hits a beggar lying face down on the sidewalk, who is mumbling thanks, or curses to all who pass. The old man next to me either doesn't see all this before him, doesn't care, or has a death wish, for he doesn't slow down. I think he digs in harder, pushing harder, moving forward faster. As we approach the sidewalk, I hear a faint, but clear ringing; it is coming from the bell on the bike's handle bars. The pedi-cab's stop, or rather due to the great effort it takes to get them moving, the operators cease all efforts and it appears that the they stop. The moto honks and speeds up, swerving the front tire left and right. It shoots out of the space between the pedi-cabs, and into the crosswalk; the driver turns hard to the left, pulls back on the throttle and scoots down the street and is quickly swallowed by the afternoon traffic. The old man and his bike split the space the moto shot out of moments before, scattering pedestrians before them as if they were seagulls on a beach/ubiquitously. He works the bike to the left, narrowly misses clipping the beggar's bowl. The old man maneuvers around the beggars outstretched hands, before hopping unto the seat and continuing his journey.  

I turn to the right ignoring the call for alms. I ignore the screeches of “Betty Goose” and “Hey You”; I ignore the slack-jaw stares, and the giggles and pointing. I ignore the moto driver staring so hard at me he almost hits a mother and the stroller she is pushing. I dodge the flying spit and the fresh, stinky pool. I swerve around the man holding a small child, whose legs are drifting open. The slit in the boy's pants begins to part and the stream of urine spurts out behind me, and splashes against a anemic, leafless tree. I just keep walking, crossing streets as they come.  

I have moved back to the states. I have been home since the summer and have enjoyed the break. I miss alot about China. I miss my students, my friends, the food, learning new things and meeting new people. I plan to go back some time next summer, probably after the olympics.

Christmas Recall

Last week there was a call from dozen Chinese graduate students to reject Christmas and return to Confucian ideals(non-Christian Chinese that is). I have no opinion on this call to return to the past one way or the other. It's their world and I'm just passing through. But today I am reminded that perhaps the Chinese people shouldn't be too quick to reject Christmas(at least out of hand) but rather discover the non-commercial, non-western religious overtones, pro-Confucian ideals in it.
I was walking down the street doing some Christmas shopping(can't even escape it here in a atheist/Buddhist country) for friends, "when what to my wandering eyes should appear", to steal from the good poem but a Christmas tree. A HUGE Christmas tree. It was sitting right in the middle of the shopping square here in our toney district. Three or four girls where hawking the chance to buy Christmas "Blessings" for ones family and future year. A very Chinese thing to do. Stop by any temple here and there is at least one person asking for 'Fu' fortune and or Fanrong prosperity. And maybe the students see this as a bad thing. Maybe they see the people replacing deep tradition with shallow, commercialized, imported Western customs and are afraid of a loss of identity. Perhaps this is true. ANd of course I am looking at this from a poly-cultural view gleaned from being raised in the good ole US of A. But it seems to me that many people here and there and everywhere miss that Christmas isn't about crass commercialism, or trees, or Father Christmas. Rather it is about asking for peace, understanding and forgiveness. It is about asking for these blessings to be bestowed upon our neighbors and not our selves. It is not to see how much material goods we can accumulate or how many blessings we can ask for ourselves. It is about giving, not shopping, not getting and definitily not about taking our things back to the store. Unfortunately that is the image and the idea that is transmitted and exported around the world. It is one more thing for people around the world to push-back against which is understandable as the message is shallow and often demeaning. Couple it with the crazy Christianists and their unholy war to save all us 'sinners' and well is it any wonder there is push-back.
For me Christmas isn't about wishing and hoping and praying and pleading for wishes and blessing for one's self. Rather it is all these things and more but doing for others; doing it for strangers even. ANd I think that message is compatible with Confucius and his ideals, hell this message is compatible with most every religion, belief or philosophy. It is the messengers that foul it all up and become to concerned with dogma and forget compassion and love and forgiveness and most importantly giving. ANd not the giving they do in church so everyone can see you and hopefully think what a swell person you are,(chances are they only spy on you long enough to see the cash disappear into the basket or plate or hat before moving on to disparage your clothes or you car or house or kids. You'll never win this people). No this is not the giving that is important. It is the giving from the heart without comment, without condemnation, without judgement and without stings. It is giving to save the person before you and not the 'soul' you'll report back to your church masters. "Mark another notch on the big board Pastor. I bagged me another soul at the Wal-Mart", or in some 'impoverished' country, or where ever godless, heathen souls are to be found. Until this proper message, of what this glorious season is all about, is emphasized nothing will change and our Western customs will be seen for what we have allowed them to become. And so in the spirit of true giving I sent the people of this polluted little river town a message of love and happy blessings from my family to theirs: "To the people of Sanming my family wishes you peace and prosperity in the coming year. May your days be pleasant and filled with joy. All the best. From the Burns's As I was filling out my card I was trying to explain all this tom my translator. I think she got some of it. But often they are not use to such words from foreigners and so maybe my message was lost. But never the less it was a wonderful opportunity to share with the people here and show not all Westerns are cold capitalists, crazy Christianist or craven coveting self-centered Plilistines. Of course most of them were just staring wide-eyed and open mouthed at the loa wai in their mist. I don't think a one of them realized I was just engaging with the Spirit of Christmas as it exists and as it is found here in the land of tea, pandas and mind boggling contradictions. Peace and Merry Christmas to you and yours from this fog-shrouded river town, known as Sanming City, PRC.

I almost forgot to mention the number one thing it takes getting use to here in China, as side from the anarchy that is driving; the bathrooms.

They come with with a varied features, but usually they all have only one smell. The features range from little more than a missing wooden plank over a hole or drainage ditch (which inevitability leads to a creek, river or stream) to more modern and Western style facilities (which inevitability leads to a creek, river or stream). Some have paper, most don't, so bring your own or you will suffer mightily. Many have piles of used paper and other items like tampons, trash as well as things that fall into your guess is as good as mine, piled in a corner or around a trash bucket.

Most of the ones outdoors have the usual spiders with their webs, as well as other creatures, like mosquitoes, moths, lizards and local Chinese bugs mostly big, black, or small brown and neither very attractive as bugs nor at this time identifiable.

Indoor johns are usually little better. The condition of their pleasantness proportional to how nice the business or house is, i.e. either loads of money and close to Western standards or not. Some even have sitters and not squatters. The really nice ones even have soap and a hand drier, but not one have I found with hot water (which is for making soup or tea).

The one thing most of them have in common whether indoor or out, Chinese style or Western, is the stench. Sometimes it is light and dainty, like a hint of tarragon or a sprig or cilantro in some horrid and putrid dish. If this is the case it is due to air freshener of some kind and some workers or home makers elbow grease. Most times however, it is overpowering and punishing, like a blow to the head, The first couple of times I utilized a Chinese facility I was sucker punched by the stench and once or twice gagged, almost vomited and was almost brought to my knees.

Now I proceed with caution, the only suprises now are when someone leaves a gift lying around. And it is still a bit shocking to walk in and see someone squatting minding their own business. This is due to the fact that most hoppers are like high school, no doors. And God and everyone can see you. Let me tell you, as shocking as it is for me to see them, it is doubly shocking to them to see me minding my business.

Any more I try to save my important business for home or if I must someplace like McDonald's (which is Chinese style, but it has doors and is usually on the light and dainty side when it comes to any assault on the ole nose. Either one of these cuts down on olfactory overload and on running into too many suprising that comes with China living.